Today I planned to post a New Year’s Greeting to all my blog friends and anyone else reading this. Instead, my day took a turn.
My big one, sweet 16, took her driving road test today and failed.
Her driving instructor took her out for one last lesson and then to the testing place. She was confident, but nervous… and she had practiced and was ready.
At the last-minute, I asked her if she wanted me to be there just for support and she said yes.
I went 15 minutes early and did not see her because they took her out as soon as she got there. She was already on the road.
After 30 minutes, I got a text from her “I did not pass”. I told her I was in front of the building and could take her home. Her instructor brought her around to me and she had the biggest crocodile tears I have ever seen. Her face was red from scalp to chin, tears streaming out, and she was so sad she could hardly get words out.
My heart broke for her.
I comforted her and talked to her instructor and got the details – about what she did wrong and when she can try again. He told me she was a great kid, and a very good driver, and she would be okay next time. I told her she had about 70 more years to drive so the next 13 days would be insignificant in the big scheme of things. Her instructor told her it wouldn’t show up on her resume so she didn’t need to cry.
None of that mattered to her at the moment.
She was heartbroken and needed to cry.
I drove her home and fate put a train on the tracks before we could pass. That gave me time to come up with an idea – to turn around and take her for ice cream. I asked her if that would make it feel better and she said yes. She spent about 10 minutes picking her ice cream because there were so many choices of this small treat to make her feel better…or because she had a lot on her mind.
She ate the ice cream and I told her there were two pieces of advice I wanted to give her…
1. you can’t let something that already happened ruin the rest of your day/life – it’s over, it’s sad, but you have so many other good things to look forward to
2. that said, you need to let yourself be sad and get it out and then move forward…my limit is one hour (at least for this scope of heartbreak) – so we spent the next 42 minutes (it was 18 minutes since her text) eating ice cream, talking about how the tester was mean, and that it was crummy she had to go through this, her crying, and me patting her and holding her.
Then I took her picture with big puffy eyes (because let’s face it, it will be funny one day), she shook it off, and then she announced to everyone in the house she was “moving forward”.
That’s my girl.